This week my sister and I were talking about the story behind each of our names. Turns out my Dad told her a story about her name that was the same story that my mom told me about my name. Someone was wrong! We both couldn’t have identical stories. Dad died, but Mom is still living, so we picked up the phone and asked her a lot of questions.
We solved the mystery.
Realistically, this confusion would not have mattered much to future generations, but it mattered to us as part of our personal history. What is important about this story is to ask questions of family members and friends while they are still able to provide information that the reader will want to know. So many times, I hear, “ I wished I had asked that before he died.”
Once you start writing your memoir, you will find many questions to ask. It’s not enough to take the same story you’ve heard repeatedly and put it down in your own words. It is necessary to tell it with fresh eyes. Look at the story and ask questions about it as if you’ve never heard it before. View it as if you were a reporter trying to get the details.
More on getting details in future blogs.
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3 comments:
Great blog and such a good idea for others to ask while the information is available. I too have heard others say "I wish we would have ask grandma while she was alive."
When my grandma's health began to decline at age 93, we took out family albums and had her tell us who each photo was. We took turns spending time with her and and writing this down. Now that she is gone, my daughter is scrapbooking small photo albums for each of us with all of that information. What a gift. Keep up the encouraging blog.
Here's another tip: Sometimes it's hard to remember to take notes when talking to a relative. A friend became the family historian by always bringing out a tape recorder when they sat at the kitchen table with relatives. By recording every conversation, she picked up stories that were missed by the note takers in her family.
Later when everyone had gone home, and it was quiet, she'd have the joy of listening again and transcribing the wonderful stories.
She got started because her dad died young along with his stories. Vowing it would not happen to her children she gathered many, many stories this way about her remaining relatives. In this way she was able to pass on a rich and varied history for her children.
Etta, it took me awhile to realize that this was your blogsite. Carma's comment turned on the light for me. After reading your entries, I am inspired to get back to my own memoir. I started the endeavor some time ago, and shelved it bc both of my parents have passed on. I still want to see if I can find someone who can help me with some critical information, but your journey in writing yours has gotten those memoir juices flowing again. You have a really nice blogsite. Thank you for sharing the "how to's" of memoir writing. As Arnold S. said in one of his movies, "I'll be back!"
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